Narrows, 2.1

[hjsnapepm]

When we last saw the Narrows, some of the spares got engaged, Prom dropped out of uni and asked her baby daddy Michael to move in to the family home. She also cheated on him right under his nose with ol' Lawson Whitby. Ramp was not pleased.


You're bloody lucky it's Michael's baby, missy. Otherwise he or she wouldn't be eligible for heir.


Ramp: Prom, dear, you left a bit of a mess in the bathroom this morning.


Ramp: It was Prominence, right, Paine?


Ramp: ...Paine?


Yes, Prom, think of Michael, father of your unborn child, love of your li---


Um...


Oh, what the hell... go ahead and move him in, too.


Prom: I don't feel so good...


Prom: OMGWTFPOP!


Paine: Come here, Hot Stuff!

Ramp: You're sure you can't have any more kids...?


Prom: My eggs are already fertilized, so we can woohoo whenever we want.

Lawson: That's... kind of hot.


Ramp: What's hot, Lawson?

Lawson: Um... chili?


Michael: So, I hear someone joined the family. Who is it?

Prom's ex ex lover Lawson who she's vowed to marry since the age of eight.


Michael: Um, OK, cool... *aspiration failure*



Michael: What a lovely idea, Professor Wilson! I can't believe I didn't think of that before!


Townie Teen: Hi, Mr Dale.


Ramp: Remember how it used to be when we first met?


Ramp: What do you say we try that thing you used to do again, for old times' sake?

Paine: All right...


Paine: Arr, thar she blows. Ramp, ho!


Prom: So, the baby is due any day now...


Paine: You and Michael should really get married, then. There's no time to waste. How about later tonight?


Prom: Um... I thought I would maybe... put off marrying Michael. For a few years. Or forever.


Paine: Hmm... You could do that. You could also stick your inheritance where the sun don't shine.


Prom: Will you marry me?


Michael: Of course I will, love.


You don't have to look so darned smug, Paine.


Psst, Prom! It's your wedding. Would it kill you to, I don't know, actually pay attention to your bloody fiance?


Prom: But Lawson's here.

hjsnapepm: *facepalm*



Well, at least we made it through the vows (and the customary after-vow make out fest)...


Lawson: Do you have ANY idea what kind of corrupt, unprincipled MISCREANT you've just welcomed into your family?!

I guess Lawson wasn't as indifferent to his long-time lover's wedding as he seemed...


Time to consummate the-- Hang on... if Michael's on the exercise machine through the window over there, who--


D:


D8


Michael: Prom, love, what's going on in h--


Michael: GAH! Aw, hell...


Michael: *slaps Prom silly*


Lawson: Hi, Prom!

Michael: *flexes muscles*


Prom: Hey, Lawson.

Michael: *flexes muscles some more*


Michael: *still flexing*


Michael: Hi, Prom!




Michael: See ya later, arsewipe.


Lawson: WHAAA, he called me arsewipe!


Michael: THINK FAST! *tackles*


Prom: Gosh, Lawson is so hot when he's beating my husband's ass.


Michael: *short circuits*


Lawson: So, what do you say you and I run away together?


Prom: LAWSON! Not. In front. Of my mother.


Prom: Besides... Lots of sims have more than one lover. No big deal, really.


Prom: It's nothing the judicious use of handcuffs can't fix.



Incidentally, Michael's assessment of Lawson's personality was spot on.



Michael: *goes to the Dark Side*


Michael: So that's how you kill someone with your thumb...

Lawson: >;-|


Lawson: Oh, goody, Prom's here!

Michael: Prominence. >:-[

Paine: Prom, dear, did you know Michael knows how to murder us all with his thumb? Isn't that amazing?


Lawson: Michael, you and Prom had a lovely wedding.

Michael: Really?


Lawson and Michael: */enemies*

Sims are...? Yep, that's right. Sims are weird.


Prom: Hey, Dad, congrats for getting abducted by aliens and forcibly impregnated with their spawn!


Ramp: Why, thank you! And congrats for cheating on your husband on your wedding night!

Sims: *are still weird*


BABY TIEM!!!


Meet Retail Narrows, female, gray eyes, brown hair, Michael's freckled skintone.


Ramp: I remember when you were just that size. *sniffs* My little girl is all grown up.


Michael: Hi, baby. I'm your daddy. Because I'm sure it's not going to be too obvious and I wouldn't want you to be confused.


Childbirth has brought out Prom's remorse. Will Michael forgive her indiscretions?

Find out next time. Dun dun DUN...