Green ISBI, 1.1

[hjsnapepm]

Yay, update time...!

...Yes, it's been over a month, but at least that month was February, so it wasn't as long as it could have been. XP I was a victim of the Great Mac OSX Quicktime Debacle of Jan/Feb '09 and I hadn't been able to psych myself up for anything Sims related until the resolution was in sight.

When we last left our intrepid Isbies (Darn it, I wish I named them that!), we discovered that Wal was not only an autonomously-gay-but-hopelessly-in-denial-and-weirdly-monogamous-Romance-sim, he was an autonomously-gay-but-hopelessly-in-denial-and-weirdly-monogamous-Romance-sim-WITH-CHILD. Thanks a lot, Beaumont.

Incidentally, murdering a not-so-idiotic autonomous sim without cheating is difficult. Note to self: Acquire cow plant at earliest opportunity.


Beau: Ahhh, woohoo and grilled cheese. What more could a Pleasure sim ask for?


Wal: So, Beau... That thing about woohooing someone who's part alien... That's just a rumor, right? Right?


Beau: Mmm. I love the smell of flatulence in the morning.


Beau: Smells like... poopy.


Wal: Beau, as you know, I'm a Romance sim. Society tells me that, as a Romance sim, I shouldn't be satisfied with just one partner--


Beau: Wal, if you want to borrow my handcuffs, just ask.


Are you trying to get off my hit list, Beau? Because you're doing it... pretty well, actually.



Very well, actually.


Um, hi?


Wal: $#&*@@*%#@ dog... @&*^%&#^ hole... #@*&$((@#$ nausea...


Wal: BLEERGH!


Wal: OMG, it's true!


Either Beau's slobbishness has caught up with him or Wal has Morning Sickness from Hell.



Beau celebrates his impending fatherhood in his own way.


This can't be good...


Beau: Have you ever experienced an overwhelming sense of impending doom?


Paine: See something interesting? Huh? Huh?


Paine: Next time I'm calling the police, you little pervert!

Beau: What is my liiiife?!


Beau: Oh, well. At least I got a promotion.


Beau: Mmm, Wal... That smells good. Save me some? *snores*


Don't worry, Beau. You could probably scrape together a whole serving from Wal's shrapnel.


Ball of Stink™: 'Sup, Beaumont?




Beau walked into the only empty room in the house, burped and went back to the living room to yell at the TV. He's a little odd.


Wal is obsessed with fried chicken. It's all he ever eats. At least he has pregnancy hormones to blame for his weirdness.


Wal: What the...?


Wal: Snow?! *facepalm*


Beau: Oooh, snow!


Wal: Beaumonnnnnt!


Meet Theresa, brown hair, gray eyes and, as far as I can tell, Wal's skintone.


Cute? Or creepy? I can't decide.


Damn it, man! Have you learned nothing?

Beau got a makeover, BTW. He's a daddy now, he's got to look the part.


Wal makes a good little Momdad.


Beau: Do I have to go to bed?

Trust me, Beau. You don't want to see this.


Wal: ...and then the house exploded. She... she didn't make it. So I just had to take him and Theresa in. You understand.

Professor Modesty: Oh, those poor things!


Professor Modesty: That was so selfless of you!


Professor Modesty: Of course I'll move in with you! And if he ever needs help taking care of little Theresa, I'll be happy to help.

Wal: That's very sweet of you, Modesty.


Alien Nanny: *ignores noisily snogging couple*


Wal: Your boobies are looking decidedly non-icky today, Mod.

Prof. Modesty: Why, thank you, Wal! I've been working on them.


I'd like to hear Wal explain this away.


Beau: *worry* *worry* *worry*


Beau: *farts* *sniffs*


Beau: *worry* *worry* *worry*


Beau: Lady, what the heck are you doing in my bathroom?


Prof. Modesty: Wal asked me to move in! Oh, I was so sorry to hear about your wife. And your poor little girl! Growing up without a mother!

Beau: My... wife?


Modesty makes up for Beaumont's lack of idiocy tenfold. She's lived here for what? Three hours?


And she's responsible for my first aspiration failure. Lovely.

Um, Wal? Beau? Where are you going?


...oh.


Prof. Modesty: And the noises! Such strange noises, doctor! Please, make them stop!


You guys are really pushing it with this cover story, you know.


Prof. Modesty: *is oblivious to anything but her own suffering*


Stop being cute, Beaumont. It makes it hard to hate you.







Thank you. That's better.


2:1 Win to Fail ratio ain't bad.


Damn it, Modesty! Quit crashing my stats!


Beau: *sobs* Oh, my poor sweet dead wife! *peeks at Modesty* She'll never see our beautiful Theresa grow up! Woe is me!!!


I'm going to take that lighter brown hair and run with it, if that's OK with you, Theresa?

Theresa: Otay!



Modesty can feel her biological clock ticking and decides to try to start a family with Wal.


This has some unfortunate side effects.


Beau: I got a promotion!

Wal: That's nice, dear. Say, we've got to talk...


Wal: I sort of got Modesty pregnant and I think I'm going to ask her to marry me. Just, you know, for appearances.

Beau: Good Lord, Wal! This is going a bit too far, don't you think?





Prof. Modesty: Why do I get the feeling I just made the biggest mistake of my life?





Despite the lies and subterfuge, they're such a cute little family.


Prof. Modesty: Ergh. *throws up in mouth* Is this morning sickness?


Not in front of Modesty, you idiots! Learn some discretion, will you?


Prof. Modesty: You cheating bastard!


Prof. Modesty: And you! Have some respect for your poor wife's memory!


Prof. Modesty: What are you... I can't... ARGH!!!


Prof. Modesty: See you later, adulterous nutters!


Beau: WAH!!! My lover's sham marriage based on a lie for the sole purpose of passing on his surname to his offspring is ruined! I am such an inconsiderate arse! I'm swearing off woohoo forever! All it causes is pain and suffering!


Beau: Mmm, delivery guy, come to Beaumont...


Current Legacy Stats:
Torch-Holders(founders/heirs): 1
Perma-Plat Sims: 0
Shrink Visits: 1
Social Bunny Visits: 0
Fires: 1
Self-Wettings: 0 (thisclose to 1)
Pass-Outs: 1
Fights: 0 (Does slapping count? I'm not counting it. There'll be enough fights in the future.)
Deaths: 0
SocialWorker Visits: 0
Alien Abductions: 0

Next time: New house, attempted suicide, and babies!

Comments

[dastiadoll.livejournal.com]

This is funny. Can't wait to read the new one.
BTW are you looking forward to Sims3 as much as I am? XD

[hjsnapepm.livejournal.com]

I wish. :( I've just about given up hope for reliable Mac versions of Sims games. They still haven't ported Freetime and Apartment Life or the last few stuff packs.

I'm glad you enjoyed it!